


I can’t see your spark though this purple haze

by possumcat_19



Category: Pocket Monsters | Pokemon - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Blood, Established Relationship, Hurt, M/M, Swearing, Violence, aint no time to pray to gods, bad guy rose, being held against will, feral mindset, i hate rose, messing up people’s minds
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-19
Updated: 2020-01-15
Packaged: 2021-02-26 02:00:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 8,042
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21855667
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/possumcat_19/pseuds/possumcat_19
Summary: Warm eyes and a warm soul. Ash was always so warm, even when he was hurt there was something warm about him.Especially his spark.Then why did he look so cold.
Relationships: Denzi | Volkner/Satoshi | Ash Ketchum
Comments: 7
Kudos: 51





	1. You Are The Reason

**Author's Note:**

> I don’t own these characters rights to their owners
> 
> I might continue this is it’s wanted.

They had a nice date before he went off to Galar, the kind that would appear ordinary but was special to them.

Volkner has asked Ash to lunch at the beach. Food was a sure-fire way to get Ash to agree to many things.

While at the beach Volkner had set up mini-challenges for Ash and him to team up against their pokemon. Ash just had Pikachu since it was his tradition to start new regions with only his starter. Volkner had his gym team, a nice day for them to relax and bond. Volkner can clearly see, Ash, letting Luxray “hold” Ash in the shallow water as the other pokemon splashed him.

Ash had really warm eyes. So happy. So lively. Just like his spark.

The next morning Volkner and Flint saw Ash off on a plane to Galar. A heavy storm blew in as he left.

For some reason, Volkners gut twisted.

————

Volkner got a call about four months later.

What was troubling was that it was his mum and not Ash. Ash hadn’t called Volkner or Flint for about three months at that point. Not even a message sent over the pokegear.

“Somethings happened to my baby!” Delia choked out. “Volkner! Volkner tell me you’ve heard from him?!” The mother begged

“I-I haven’t, No I haven’t, not- not for two weeks” he breathed out, He needed to breathe, Ash was fine, always fine whilst traveling.

Ash was fine, the only time he wasn't was when he was safe and at home with Volkner.

Ash was fine?

(He’s head was screaming, wolves were howling and snarling.)

Oh, Oh-ho no” Delia began to pray on the other line.

“Delia, Delia he’s probably fine, we both know he can forget to charge his gear?” Volkner Uttered.

He didn’t believe that very much but Ash was prone to miraculous accidents.

“ No! He’s not Volkner!” The distraught mother hissed

“Ho-“

“A mother knows, I can feel it in my heart” she whimpered

“Somethings happened”

—————

He couldn’t sleep, after Delia’s call, he hadn’t slept. Four days and nothing heard from or about Ash.

~~**( What was time next to eternity, the wolves never getting closer. Why couldn’t they kill him now )** ~~

Flint agreed with Delia, and Volkner didn’t doubt something had happened but he trusted Ash.

Growing up in Sinnoh Volkner had some minor trust in his region's gods, but he would always bet on Ash before he would even think to pray to them. If Ash was really was in trouble this time, would Volkners prayers even be listened to? Was Ash to far for even the creators who made Sinnoh their sanctum to care?

His next thoughts were more productive.

What could the gods do that Volkner couldn’t? Volkner had his brain he had his pokemon, and be damned Flint would come chasing after Ash with him.

Why wasn’t he already there then?

~~**( Why weren’t the wolves eating them already )** ~~

————-

Entering Galar was easy for two powerful and respected trainers of Sinnoh.

Even easier when Volkner full flaunted his relation to his aunt Cynthia. The Champion.

Getting paperwork done for. Their pokemon that weren’t native took a little time, but if something happened to Ash with Pikachu then they would be fools to go in without their best teams. Volkner hoped that they were just paranoid bastard who would see Ash and be chewed out for worrying.

**~~( Loud roars in his head and howling in the distance, what was happening? Why him? Why was it so dark? Just a little light, please? Anyone?)~~ **

The deal to get access to Galar was agreeing to meet with the chairman.

The chairman had wanted to meet at the prize rose tower but a call from the man's secretary told them that they would meet at Hammerlock. Something about now there was developmental tech they wanted to show him. Only Volkner was allowed into the elevator.

_Flint was less than pleased._

The eighth gym leader who’s gym was set in the same ‘stupidly overkill’ castle offered to battle the elite fire-type trainer while they waited. Flint always one for a battle wasn’t quite as fired up.

Maybe it was because they were supposed to be finding his friend. Who could be in massive trouble knowing Ash.

But this was the agreement and Flint was frustrated, poor Raihan would have to face the bottled up fire inside flints gut.

————

Coming down the elevator chairman Rose began his spiel.

“The project will ensure Galars' future success, solar power is one way but we are almost ready to release a new energy source” the man praised.

“I’m sure your on to something but are you sure it’s wise to release without a few more years of testing?” Volkner offered. ‘Nothing wrong with solar power. You just can’t stand to be similar to other regions’ Volkner mused in his head.

Volkner was content to continue his developing and improving the solar power process thank you, **SIR**!

The man continued to rant on about stars and how Galar was bound to be different from the moment it was created. As they came out of the lift and down what appeared to be a short hallway with a large opening Volkner paid extra attention.

His gut was twisting in painful anticipation.

“Originally we had planned for our Champion to help us in the final stages but we found a _willing_ volunteer who was much more helpful!” That sounded shadier than it should.

A large platform stood facing an overwhelming large room. Filled with tall towers containing what? The stars Rose was talking about? This better energy? His eyes were drawn to the large purple sphere.

A swirling substance was Volkners first observation.

A darker shape inside was the second.

And third? It was moving.

“What the hell is that?” Volkner barked turning to face Rose, who was standing at a keypad.

“That dear boy is the _future_!” Rose marveled, typing onto the keypad. “Watch the floor!” He warned as a circle hatch slid open and a container glided up out of it.

Volkners eyes widened in horror and shock.

————-

Flint had demolished Raihan. A simple one-on-one but still a beating was a beating. Raihan has then started to talk to Flint about their fire type gym leader and how he was the complete opposite. Raihan has suggested they stop by kabu’s gym in Motostoke.

“We’re not here to sightsee” was Flints rather snappy retort.

“Oh, then what?” Sue the man Raihan was curious.

Before Flint could start a loud blaring over the loudspeakers interrupted their talk.

** “ Raihan to lab center0. **

** Raihan to lab center0. **

** I repeat Raihan to lab center0 ” **

Raihan booked it to the elevators Flint racing after him.

Was that the lab Volkner was in?

Was he gonna have to call Cynthia?

Was Volkner exploded?

They entered the massive room Flint zoomed in on Volkner _pinning_ chairman Rose to the wall!

“What the hell is going on!” Raihan shouted to Volkner, Flint just realizing the released pokemon. Ambipom and Jolteon standing between Volkner and the others. No doubt waiting for a wrong move. They seemed agitated at the least. Jolteon looks ready to kill.

Still, everyone was focused on the chairman and Volkner.

“Gym leader Volkner release Rose now!” Raihan ordered. Reaching for his Flygon. Jolteon snarled at the same time as its trainer.

Firing a charge beam, Flint jumped on Raihan to push the man down.

“The actual hell Volkner!” Flint yelled at his best friend. All he got was another snarl and a finger pointing to the other side of the platform. From his place on the ground Flint round his sight on Volkners other pokemon.

Luxray and Electivier standing guard as Octillery stood closer to Raichu...

Who was standing pawing at a glass casing?

Leading his eyes up Flint couldn’t help himself from gasping in a ragged breath.

Hazy reddish purple eyes not meeting his own. Those eyes didn’t belong on that face.

_That face belonged to Ash_.

Ash?

_**~~(lightning bolt struck. It was so far. Yet it was so bright! The roaring continued filling his head)~~ ** _

————-

There kneeling in this glass container.

Dead eyes, colored so wrongly.

where was his spark?

Head hung low.

Hands cuffed behind him.

Was Ash.


	2. The Scientist

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finding him was one thing.  
> Seeing what was done to him was another.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love this an I hope you all love it too!  
> Though I actually really just wanna write fluff my gods demand angst.
> 
> Feel free to give feedback

Ash. 

_That was Ash in there_.

_Why was Ash in there?_

Why was it always Ash?

Scrambling off Raihan, Flint charged past the pokemon, reaching Raichu next to the tube.

The tube that held Ash.

Raichu cried softly at him. What was happening?

He slammed his fist onto the container. What was he hoping to do? 

“ **Ash**! Ash, Can You Hear Me?  Ash! ”

( ~~ **_He smelt smoke, felt a hot gust. It was so real. The roaring turned into a low rumble. Another bolt struck. It was so beautiful. And the smell of smoke was a little comfort. The howling was nothing._ ** ~~ But the wolves still watched)

—————-

While Flint tried to gain a reaction, Volkner was considerably close to choking Rose to death.  It wasn’t hard to do so. No. Volkner worked with machines who put up harder fights.  He could hear Flint calling Ash. 

He could hear someone calling him.

Irrelevant.

All that mattered was making sure this bastard stopped breathing.

“ _Why did you do this?_ ”  Volkner hissed right into Rose’s face. “ _What did he do?_ ” 

If Volkner wasn’t invested in why this scumbag would do this to his boyfriend, Rose would’ve been hurled off the platform already.  He released the pressure around the monster’s throat, giving it a chance to elaborate.

“He... he... ” the man began to wheeze. “Assssk-ed to _help_ -” Rose tried to explain. Volkner tightened his grip.

“Ner-real-ose,” jumbled words began reaching him. “He needs- won’t-“

“ **Volkner, Ash Needs Help.** ”  That was Flint.

Taking his eyes off Rose, he traced a path to Flint. His eyes sharply glazed over the gym leader trying  _ in vain  _ to quell Volkner’s ire. It landed on Flint, who had tears gathering in rage and fear.

Fear for Ash.  Ash - next to Flint - separated by glass.  A misty haze surrounding him. Him just sitting there. 

Quiet.

Cold.

Sparkless.

Snarling and even more enraged, Volkner launched the blue-faced monster at the gym leader asking for the man. 

“Find the fucking control board!” Volkner grated out, wiping his face with his arm.

( _~~**Lightning was shooting down more frequently. It was starting to scare him and the rumbling had become whining. Was it afraid of lightning? He could never be. No matter how close it struck or how searing it felt, it wouldn’t hurt him. He trusted the storm wouldn’t hurt him. It would guide him**~~_ )

Jolteon and Luxray took to circling Raihan and Rose. Raichu hadn’t moved from the casing and Octillery was aiming at the entrance, ready to stop anyone else entering. Ambipom jumped closer to Flint while keeping its eyes on its trainer, waiting for action.

———- 

Raihan had rushed to help Rose stand but Rose pushed him back.  What was he supposed to do?  What the hell was this about?  He knew there was a lab test. It was his second duty to protect it, no matter how much Rose said to prioritize the labs over the tapestries. 

Those where their history, they came first.

But what came first here? Chairman Rose? The apparent  Ash in a  tube ?!

He met the young man ages ago, he wasn’t a challenger. Just a trainer checking out his gym. They had talked and Ash had asked what was Rose’s deal with this place. Raihan mentioned they were labs and Rose was invested in developing tech for the ‘great future of Galar’. Ash had snorted and thanked Raihan for his time, mentioning how a battle would be cool before leaving. It wasn’t suspicious at the time. So why was he here? What did he do? What did  Rose do?

What was the priority here? Go call Leon? Get everyone out and call the police?

Stepping back he locked eyes with blood red.  Luxray.

He hadn’t battled one, but it being an electric type, Flygon or Gigalith would work.  Maybe sensing his intention the  giant  cat growled, moving its body lower.

Shit.

“Keep reaching for your pokemon and one of them will take your hand off.” A low voice uttered.  Raihan eyes snapped up to Flint, the man kept his eye on him while he had one hand on the glass.

“Your  friend violently attacked my region Chairman, I have to-“ 

“Your regional chairman has my friend in this thing, hyped up on who knows what and doing who knows what to him. You wanna talk about _who’s in the wrong?_ _ Who’s _ _in the tube?_ ” Flint challenged.

( ~~_**The smoke came back. Warmer. No burning. But warmer.**_~~ )

Raihan gulped.  Flint’s eyes shot over his back.

“Volkner, are you sure we should open it?” 

“We  need to get him out.” Volkner sounded one second away from screaming. Flint turned fully, catching Raihan’s eyes once more.

“I’m not saying we don’t. I’m saying we wait for medical help. Who knows what’s happening to him? Removing him might hurt him, Volkner. ” Flint pointed out.

Volkner gave no reply.

“Your friend’s right,  _boy_. Removing him will surely have greater consequences than you could even imagine.” Rose whispered. “Sir, shut up.” Raihan nudged him with his foot.

These guys weren’t pushovers. They could kill them both and rip apart the city if they weren’t careful.

“I’d listen to your gym leader.” Flint warned. The red head’s eyes darted over his back once again. 

“You want your friend awake and whole? Then you’ll return your Pokémon and leave.” Rose demanded, regaining his strength and standing, holding his heavily bruised throat.

Raihan prayed for a miracle.

———-

A buzzing noise broke the tension. A small thin tube came from the foot next to ash and inserted itself into its Ash’s chamber.  Purple seeped through it and into Ash’s.  The orb behind him hummed. Something inside shifting.

Ash’s head rose as he breathed in the purple haze. His eyes lit up reddish with purple tinges.  Everyone turned to the tanks. To Ash.  The tension was building up again. 

“What is happening?” Raihan was dreading the answer.  The answer came as Ash smashed his head into the glass. Letting out his own snarl as he repeated the head smashing. 

The banging erupted into what could be described as a caged beast waking up.  Volkner moved forward to Flint as the caged man let loose a scream that turned into a roar.  The thing in the orb behind him mimicking him.

( ~~_** IT WAS HOWLING AND ROARING, BEATING DOWN HIS SPINE! HE TRIED TO SPOT THE LIGHTNING TO SMELL THE SMOKE BUT THE ROARING WASNT LETTING HIM! A HOWL DIFFERING FROM HIS BROKE THROUGH. A WOLF) ** _ ~~

———-

“It will settle!” Rose yelled over the screaming.

_ Ash’s screaming. _

His own pokemon was crying. Ash was crying. He was crying.  Volkner didn’t even feel himself move.  A crack of a nose brought him into focus. Rose’s nose.  As the man fell, Volkner was left standing, facing the entrance. 

And standing there.

** Another man. **

The man was watching Volkner watch him.

_Leon_.


	3. Blood and Bones

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leon couldn’t have walked into a worse situation, He doesn’t stay for long though.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay so number 3! All good! Not so good. 
> 
> they hurt.  
> I hurt.
> 
> I also just wanna say my beta was Corinthis and they have amazing atla fics! I just read one called ‘Missing Mittens’!

Now Leon didn’t want to jump to conclusions. But one couldn’t help thinking that maybe, just maybe.... this wasn’t a personal call. 

It was an attack!

Of course, the screaming and screeching of whatever Pokémon that was wasn’t good. But walking in just to see this guy left hook Rose to the floor, looking like his family was murdered was another tip to Leon that maybe he should have asked for Kabu. 

The old man could throw down just as good as Bea.

The Pokémon screaming its lungs out seemed to take it up a notch as they made eye contact.

“GO CHARIZ-“ Leon grabbed the ball, readying the launch the unknown blonde just pointed at him and _white-hot bloody pain_ flooded his system.

———-

Rose was on the floor bleeding from the nose. Leon, a smoking lump with a Jolteon practically standing on him. And what has to be the most pain-filled and feral screaming reaching his ears. Raihan was afraid. Afraid to look at the source of the screaming. Afraid to look at his friend. At his chairman. At these men in a whole other playing field.

“Flint....go find someone.” Volkner’s whisper rang in his ears.

“Who? No one up there’s gonna help.” Flint pointed out. The blonde let out a shaky breath, head shaking and using one hand to cover his eyes. The heavy solid banging of Ash seemed to still. So did the screaming.

( **Nothing, just eternity of purples and reds 'same as always')**

The silence was filled by ragged breaths and the occasional groan from Leon.

“It’s Raihan, right?” Volkner asked, side-eyeing him. Raihan nodded, Would his voice work, please?

“Flint, take _our friend_ Raihan and go find a lab tech, they wouldn’t be too far away.... _would they buddy?_ ” Volkner leaned his head back sneering at him. Raihan wished looks could kill. A Pokémon being released caught his attention as a Flareon took astride next to Flint. Flint grabbed Raihan’s arm and began dragging him past Leon.

“Relax man, We’re not gonna murder you.” If this was Flint’s attempt at calming him, then he called BS “Ash is more likely to kill Rose once he can walk.”

“..... _what_?” Raihan whimpered.

( **PAINPAINPAINPAIN THERE WAS SOMETHING HERE SOMETHING OTHER THAN ETERNITY WHERE WAS IT IN THIS PAINPAINPAIN)**

As the two men and the Flareon were waiting for the elevator doors to close...A horrible scream broke through. Flint’s grip on Raihan tightened. Raihan grabbed at the other man’s arm, trying to dislodge the hand whose grip felt like a Trapinch. The doors slammed shut.

“When we get up there, you’re gonna tell them Rose tripped an alarm on accident.” Flinted gritted out, “You’re gonna ask that the head tech should come down and sort it out.” Raihan nodded again. Looking down he watched as the Flareon’s tail wrapped around its trainer’s leg. Flint dropped his arm and clenched his fist. A weird look crossed his face and Raihan prayed again that the doors would open,

“Where’s Pikachu?” That was his final question as the doors mercifully opened. 

———-

Ash was letting out another scream but this was different. Volkner watched, moving closer to him as he returned Ambipom, Octillery, and Luxray. His own eyes were becoming blurry with tears.

‘Damnit Ash, you should have gone with someone,’ he brooded. Closer to Ash meant being closer to the piercing, heart stabbing screams. They didn't sound like the roars when he was first smelling the mist. They were more like the sobbing you hear from a broken man. Ash wasn’t broken. Ash was supposed to be an unbeatable force to most. But never to him.

( **ETERNITY NEEDS TO LEAVE BUT HOW CAN IT LEAVE IF IT’S IN HIM)**

Volkner can remember the first time he experienced Ash have a breakdown. It was a slow build; crying for no reason before he stopped smiling. Devolving into him, clinging to Volkner’s chest as Ash tried to breathe through visions of gods firing at him. Nothing could be worse than when Volkner realized that Ash was trying to shoulder everything, that Ash was just like him. Volkners' been in the worst of himself. He learned that Ash had never allowed himself to be at his worst.

Volkner was crying and _maybe Ash was too._

Electivire moved behind him, keeping an eye on the exit for Flint. Raichu tucked its head into Volkner’s side, looking for comfort. Jolteon jumped off Leon - the man wouldn’t be walking for a bit - as he walked between Volkner and Ash’s containment. Jolteon sniffed the glass before crying out.

“We’ll get him home, _we’ll get him home_ ,” Volkner told them. He knew they would.

Ash continued to scream.

———-

Surprisingly, grabbing the lab tech was easy. The hard part was getting the tech into the room once she saw  The Regional Champion zapped to oblivion. It may have gotten harder when she saw  The Regional Chairman with a beaten in the face, bruises on his neck and was non-responsive. _The screaming wasn’t helping but she had been hearing him scream daily._

Raihan reassured her that he would protect her if the two tried to hurt her. Raihan was blatantly ignoring Flint’s dry snort

“Open it.” Volkner requested, standing to the side of the tube and glaring at the technician. “I, unfortunately, can’t do that, sir. Only Chairman Rose can authorize that.” She clipped back. Next to Volkner unnoticed by everyone, Ash stilled and his red eyes widened.

( **I...Know Her, She’s 'Shes back')**

“Well he’s been decommissioned for a while, I’m sure you’d hate to follow your fantastic chairman to his new position.” Flint quipped, walking and nudging Rose’s unconscious body. A threat. _Subtly_.

“ _Flarrrrre..._ _” "_ _Jolt jolt._ ” The two eeveolutions growled.

She left Raihan’s side quickly, stepping over Rose. She stepped next to the now rising control pad. 

“He seems to be quiet, but I can’t assure you that he will be the person you knew.” She disclosed. 

“I’m sure we can get him help once you explain to the international league council what the hell you did to him.” Volkner spat, glaring at her. “Galar has nothing to do with the league council,” Raihan budded in. Flint took to glaring at the dragon specialist. Volkner did not take his eyes off the lady,

“But Ash does,” Flint told.

The hissing of compressed air interrupted their silence. Volkner took a stance in front of the tank ready to catch Ash if he fell. Flint stepped up behind his friend.

Raihan wanted to run but he couldn’t abandon his best friend. That and the fang-bearing Electivire watching him.

**'I** **TS OPENING 'Freedom?'**.

———-

As the front glass moved around, Ash’s body pitched forward. Volkner raised his arms to catch him. Ash’s head shot up. Muddled reds and purple zeroed in on a figure behind Volkner.

 _And he lunged_.

Ash, trying to raise hardy controlled arms and launching towards the technician, smashed hard into Volkner. Volkner closed his arms around his boyfriend trying to restrain him. A bad move. Ash let out a demonic scream right into Volkner’s ear. Ash’s arms moved up the front Volkner’s jacket and began to claw at his chest. “Ash, Ash it’s me! _Arrgg_!” Volkner grunted in pain. Something wet slide down his side.

**Blood**.

“ **LET ME OUT LETMEOUTLETMEOUT!** ” Ash roared.

“Holy Shit! Volkner, Let Him GO!” Flint squawked.

“HOLY HELL!” Raihan shouted.

“Ash. Please it’s me, Ash.” Volkner begged. Ash began to thrash. Claws - he shouldn’t have - was tearing at Volkner. His thrashing paid off as Ash knocked free of his hold and charged wildly towards the woman. 

**“ I KNOW YOUR VOICE IVE HEARD IT THROUGH IT ALL"** the enraged call came from Ash as he reached her,“ **THE MAN TOO! BUT NOW YOU CAN HURT NOW!** ”

“WAIT NO!” She screamed as Ash reached her just enough to scratch her face.

“ **FLAMETHROWER** ”

———-

Flint shouted.

His Flareon hearing its trainers panic had reacted at told. Volkner would never blame Flint for reacting. His best friend always went to protect the screaming. But he could be bitter.

“ **ARGHH** !” Ash cried as the flamethrower hit him. And sent him flying towards the edge of the platform _hanging over a fucking chasm of a room._ Volkner tried to get up and run to Ash. The large scratches, on his chest, stopped him. 

“A-ugh!” he moaned as he fell onto his side. “ _Shit_.” he hissed as pain engulfed him.

Even squinting, Volkner’s eyes didn’t leave Ash. As his body landed heavily on the floor, and he began to roll closer to the edge. Breathing hurt, but Volkner wasn’t breathing anymore. His breath caught in his throat. Ash’s body turned as he slowed his rolling. Not slow enough as his legs fell over the side. The rest of him looked like it would follow if Ash didn’t claw himself back onto his knees. Volkner watched as Ash panted ragged breaths. His right side smoking, judging by the smell Flareon had hit the skin. Ash was only in a shirt and jeans.

“ **Why... Stop Me?** ” Ash gasped.

“ **Grrr... Stay OUT!** ” He roared.

Red eyes rounded back onto the scientist, snapping his head to her as well. 

“ **I** ’m **No** **T** **D** on **E** With **Her** ” he cried, tears were falling down his face now as he tried to stand. He snarled, broken up by wheezing.

“Ash,” Volkner called weakly. Ash’s head shook as if shaking off Volkner’s call.

“Ash...” Volkner tried again voice straining with pain, Ash stopped struggling.

“Ash...” It sounded like a ghost.

Ash turned his body, _warm_ brown eyes overflowing with tears as he looked at him.

“ _Volk_...?” He sounded so broken, “what?... why?” His eyes glanced up, catching a shell shocked Flint. Eyes racing back down to meet Volkner’s, Ash’s whole body shook more.

“Volkner!” Ash let out a sob as he stumbled quickly over to the blonde. Once he was next to Volkner, he turned the man on to his back.

“Did... _did I?_ ” Ash stuttered over Volkner’s chest, looking at the slash marks. Volkner couldn’t help but watch Ash’s sad eyes. Collapsing onto Volkner, Ash’s sobbing turned into broken sounds. 

“Oomph!” Volkner raised a little at the sudden weight on his chest. Ash’s body convulsed a bit. Placing his hand on Ash’s back, Volkner tried rubbing circles to calm Ash.

“I got you, we’re gonna be fine, it wasn’t your fault,” Volkner whispered to his boyfriend, crashing on his chest.

_“It wasn’t your fault...”_

Whosever it was, _was a dead man._


	4. If I could Fly

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Volkner wakes up.  
> him and Flint talk.  
> Cynthia has to make a call

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for the wait, I've been meaning to post but no one could edited it. I tried to do it by myself so wish me luck!
> 
> also, I can write faster if I know what you readers want, so tell me what you feel or what you want.

The Sunnyshore.

Itʼs what his home was named for. A Sinnoh beach that looked good in the sun. What else could you name such a place? He was just standing watching the waves and the sun, it was a serene view. Postcard-perfect.

The view was perfect but he felt cold.

Volkner felt cold to his soul. The sun wasnʼt warming him and the waves werenʼt even washing over his feet, so why was he cold?  
A sharp sting spiked in his chest, he reached over his heart with his left hand. It hurt like his own heart was being squeezed. Trying to extinguish something. Was it trying to extinguish him? He grasped his shirt as the pain spiked again.  
Heat began to build upon his right as if a fire was approaching. Even with the pain of his heart and the warmth growing at his side, Volkner never took his eyes off the view in front of him. The postcard-perfect view.  
Something warmed touched his right hand. 

That something took Volkners hand and placed itʼs own in it. It was warm. That warmth from the hand moved up his arm, into his chest. The warmth stemming from his hand soothed over his heart, taking the pain with it. Volkner closed his eyes from the familiar shore and let out a breath.

“Itʼs a nice view but I have seen better”   
Volkner whipped his head to the voice, from his right.

“Thereʼs nothing missing from this view” Volkner growled looking at a man, holding his hand. Volkner didnʼt feel like letting it go despite his mood.

“Never said it was missing something” the nerve of this man, this very warm man.

“Saying youʼve seen better is saying somethingʼs missing from here” Volkner shot back.

“You sure?” The man asked looking up to the view, Volkners eyes followed.  
His eyes opened wider at the brighter view before him.  
“Was it missing something Volkner?” He asked 

“It was missing warmth” Volkner breathed “it was missing you” 

  
——

  
“Ash!” Volkner shot up in panic from the bed he was on. When did he get into a bed? Wasnʼt he just on the floor with   
“Ash!”   
His head whipped to the left. There. There was a bed next to his own. Ash was in that bed. Just lying there on his back, eyes closed sleeping. A chill set in.  
Leaning back but still watching Ash Volkner backtracked events. Ash jumping out of the tank. Finding the tank, tanks. There were two. Ash in one and whatever Rose called it in the other. Strangling Rose, Punching Rose.   
He hoped that the monster was still breathing. Volkner was smart enough to know that the man needed to be outed alive if he was to suffer for what he did to his boyfriend.  
*knock*knock*  
Blue eyes leaving Ash they now faced another familiar face, this one didnʼt look so pale. As lively as his damn hair.

“Flint” Volkner mumbled,

“Wouldnʼt be you if you greeted me as a friend would it?” Flint lamely joked.  
Flint moved to sit beside Volkner on his right, facing Ash. His friend looked pained as he gazed at Ash. Volkner cleared his throat gaining Flint's attention,  
“How long was I out?” He asked, moving his arm to check where he... where he was scratched. They felt strained but all he could feel were the bandages.  
“A day and a bit, Galars got some nifty equipment,” Flint remarked, “A bit worse then what Luxrays has given you   
but they might scar” he finished gesturing to his chest.  
A day in a hospital in a foreign region and hardly any good news for Ash aside from the fact heʼs alive. Dropping his hand from his chest Volkner angrily grasped the rough cold blanket. 

Watching his friends' anger Flint thought heʼd share what happened yesterday.  
“I called Cynthia, she showed up late last night” he looked at Volkner he continued “She just about took my head off, I mean why would I call her about trouble if I caused it?” He grumbled.  
Volkner let out a soft huff of air, Flint knew that meant he was trying not to laugh.  
“She stormed off her jet and pointed a finger at me cussing how ‘ _Iʼm going to hurl_  
_you into the next volcano you ever see_ ʼ like thatʼs a viable threat after last time” Flint scoffed   
“Sheʼs gonna hurl you into _unemployment_ , if we keep this up” Volkner smirked lightly  
“Itʼs not like weʼre the ones usually playing hero, thatʼs Ashʼs-“ Flint cut himself off looking over to the man in the other bed. Lying perfectly still, youʼd think him   
dead if not for the breathing.  
“I guess we now know why Ash always asked us not to go finding trouble when he wasnʼt around” Volkner tried to relax the atmosphere,  
Flint laughed quietly “He was the one causing the trouble we hardly needed to find it”. They both let out quite little laughs. 

A thought suddenly hit Volkner as he   
looked for a table.  
“What you looking for buddy?” Flint inquired  
“My Pokémon, speaking of it have they found Pikachu? He wasnʼt in that room was he?” Volkner asked, eyes still zooming around.  
“Yours and some of mine are trying to distract a rather _snappy rat_ from killing us all” Flint informed his blonde friend,“ I thought Pikachu would be with Ash already if you found him?” Volkner spurred for more answers Where did they find Pikachu?   
“He would be but the doctors said Ash couldnʼt handle him?” Flint tried to recall, he could vaguely remember what the man was saying before   
Cynthia caught a ball of _pure fur and fury_.  
Waving his hand in a dismissive gesture, resting his head in his other which was on Volkners' bed. “The point was no Pokémon in the room, Iʼve got Electivair and Magmortar watching the door though, I'd trust useless G-men over Galra guards”  
“Whenʼd you grow so suspicious Flint?” Volkner lowered his head to rest. Looking over he realized Ash was also propped up.

“Ever since we found Ash in their basement” Flint spat, Volkner was taken at the hardness in his friends' eyes. Flint was never the angry one.   
Silence descended on them again. Flint took to glaring at the bed, while Volkner himself   
went back to looking at Ash.  
Now he was more awake he noticed something. Harsh triangles almost like the tips of claws reached around Ashʼs neck. They progressively got small disappearing right where his hair started.   
“Flint. What did happen to Ash?” Volkner asked in a whimper only Flint and Ash would ever   
hear from the man.

Those marks werenʼt supposed to be there. He knew Ashʼs skin and those werenʼt supposed to be there.  
Flint let out a harsh sigh as he looked at the sleeping Ash too. Why would he _want to_ tell Volkner? It would only make the blonde angry and sadder, but Volkner was Ashʼs boyfriend if Ash wanted anyone to know it would be   
Volkner.   
Flint knew that there where things Volkner knew that Ash wouldnʼt even tell his mother. Things Volkner held like they were the great dragon orbs.

“He... he. Rose was trying... he was trying t-“ Flint hesitated, how does a man do this?.  
“Flint” Volkner barked out lowly, the redhead was getting distracted. “ What did he do to Ash” Volkner stressed.  
“Itʼs hard to explain Volkner!” 

“Well try”

Flint pulled back his hair with a groan. Only Azelf had enough will power to deal with Volkner, Azelf, and Ash. Flint let out a harsh breath.  
“Rose was... He was trying to fuse? Combine? No bond?-“ Volkner cut him off,  
“Flint those words mean the same thing”   
“Itʼs hard to explain! Itʼs like he was trying to make Ash and that Pokémon in the large orb tank thingy, mind link....? So that he could control Eternatus by controlling Ash” Flint finally managed to articulate,

“Eternatus?” Volkner asked   
“Thatʼs the Pokémonʼs name, Some professor said how it could have caused what they call ‘ _The darkest day_ ʼ” Flint explained, Volkner rolled his eyes letting out a low groan.  
'Just like Kalosʼ, he mused.

“Dramatic much? ‘ _Darkest day_ ʼ?”   
Volkner muttered.  
They shared another hushed laugh. It ended and the beeping of equipment monitoring Ash filled the space. Flint broke it  
“Heʼs got these weird markings now” Flint confessed “side effects of having Eternatus forced onto him, straight down his spine and weird spikes like... I guess like ribs? If that   
makes sense?” 

“It doesnʼt” Volkner clipped back at Flint.  
Flint groaned louder than he should have to throw his face into his hands. Volkner smacked his head shushing him.  
‘I hate our friendship sometimesʼ Flint inwardly bemoaned.   
———

Cynthia was on one hell of a warpath. She was the head of her region, she was the head of her council and she damn well was going to use every ounce of authority she had to send Rose to hell. She hadnʼt even called Lance. She should probably call Lance now.   
So far reporters only knew that there had been a huge scandal and that some Sinnoh officials had been involved and Cynthia had been called.

Nothing that would need Lance's attention but he should know that Ash was involved before the world knew.  
Walking into an office she was given she sat down. Reaching for the desk phone she stalled. Taking her hand back she thought what she could tell the man 

‘Lance? Hi, Iʼm informing that ash- no. More compassion?  
Lance Iʼm calling about Ash- No that makes it sound like Ash did something wrong this isn't his fault.ʼ

The Sinnoh champions hard thinking was cut short when the phone went off. Not the desk phone.   
_Her personal phone_.  
Opening it quickly her breath caught in her throat as she saw the id. She swallowed and   
answered it.

“ Cynthia? I was told that I should be expecting a call but I decided to call on my own.” Lance explained, “what would I be expecting?” He finished,  
“Uh... Lance yes... I was going to call you yes” she coughed “Lance... I”  
“If I called prematurely I can call back?” He offered,   
no he should hear it now.  
“Lance” She sucked in a shuttered breath   
“Is everything okay?” Lance caught on quickly,  
“Lance... Arceus, _Lance itʼs Ash_ ” She croaked “They found him and Lance... theyʼve had him long enough..."


	5. Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> introspections are common when there are things to be discussed but no one's talking about them.  
> Flint knows that Volkner doesn't want to or need to talk about things, But with Lance looming closer maybe he might have to.
> 
> Volkner always seems to have uncanny timing.  
> glowsticks are not needed anymore.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So i still don't have my beta reader but its okay. We can do this. 
> 
> what am i thinking?!  
> I've had 4 and five ready so i thought i should really update. 
> 
> Please tell me your thoughts, opinions, and ideas. I write best with feedback!

Flint and Volkner spent the next two hours talking about anything that wasnʼt Ash and falling into silent spurs. It wasnʼt uncomfortable though, it was just hard not to fall into topics revolving around Ash. And generally, Flint didnʼt mind talking about Ash, Volkner could talk about Ash longer than he could stay interested in a project.

It was just weird talking about Ash when he was right next to them unconscious. After being royally _mindfucked_. 

Flint was worried, heʼd seen trainers lose their minds after horrible psychic attacks. Ash was forced to have a Pokémon forced into mind, his soul. How do you come back from that? Ash seemed to bounce back from a lot of things, broken arms, concussions, burns - flint burned Ash-, probably hyperthermia.

Flint wasnʼt sure about the hyperthermia but a lot of trainers fell victim to it so it was likely.

Volkner would probably know more of the stuff Ashʼs has gotten himself involved him, but Flint knows that this isnʼt a usual issue to deal with.

Ash had attacked Volkner too. They hadnʼt talked about that either. Did Volkner realize that?  
That Ash had been so lost to Eternatus that he hurt someone? Well, Ash has been planning to at best scratch the lab tech who released him. To be fair the tech had also been torturing him. Would Volkner want to even bring up the attack?

  
Flint didnʼt want to blame Ash, but what came out of that tank wasnʼt Ash.   
Was it?   
From his inner thoughts, Flint caught the sound of heels clicking towards them.

" _Elllect_ " came from the electric half of the room guards before a silhouette entered the doorway.  
Flint twisted in the chair to face the doorway catching Volkner's attention too.  
——-

Cynthia walked past the two Pokémon at the door with a nod to them. 

Looking over the room she saw Flint in a chair next to her nephew, said nephew was sitting back in the hospital bed. And on the left? Ash looking pale. This room was cold she realized, she hoped he was warm enough.

Turning back to the two awake she took note of Volkner. He looks fine, no pain present on his face, glaring at her but not in pain. He was in a hospital gown like a regular patient. Cynthia could remember another hospital visit with Volkner where he adamantly denied wearing one.  
She let out a chuckle as she moved closer.

  
"Whatʼs got you laughing?" Volkner grunted out,   
"Why I was just remembering when you vowed youʼd never wear a gown" she retorted.  
"Like I had a choice I was out cold apparently" he scolded.  
Cynthia took on a grimace,  
"Yes, I suppose you were..."   
Turning her back to them both she moved over to Ash.   
"I was only told bare-bone facts about what transpired down there" she announced "then Flint told me more about what happened"  
She missed Volkner shooting Flint a very dirty glare. "Youʼd think that someone else in his place would let a little   
thing like a burn slow him down" she added, "The tech I spoke too said they were surprised he even lived through the first session"

"It would be Ash if he went down at the   
start would it?" Flint commented dryly, 

Cynthia let out a sad laugh "It really wouldnʼt be, yet I wish he wouldnʼt have lasted as long as he did"  
"What do you mean by that?" Volkners' voice held a threat. Only he could get away with that tone and not be curbed stomped by her heel.   
"I mean is that maybe if he wasnʼt as strong   
as he is... he wouldnʼt even be here" she acknowledged.  
She placed a hand on Ashʼs cheek and watched as he flinched away.   
Humming in sadness she faced both Flint and Volkner again.

  
"Ash is suffering for his strength-" she was rather abruptly cut off  
"Donʼt you dare even think of blaming anything on Ash, itʼs not his fault some sick bastard thought about fusing him with a god!" Volkner all about growled turning in the bed to throw his legs over the side,  
"Hell, this isnʼt the first fucking time this has happened to him! And I distinctly help that _Flare freak_ trying the same shit!"   
"Iʼm not blaming Ash Volkner, he was forced into this against his will. But he hurt people. Those scratches on your chest, _he_ caused them" she cooly fired back,  
"Heʼs mind wasnʼt his own! He was still influenced by the gas! The gas _they_ put into him! And I grabbed him while he was confused, weʼve both seen what a confused Pokémon can do" Volkner contended   
"Heʼs not a Pokémon, but I hear what you're saying" she apologized "Iʼm sorry Volkner but heʼs a risk, a large one even you canʼt deny that"   
The room fell into a tense silence.   
Volkners' shoulders were bunched and Cynthia was sporting a cold face, watching each other. She eventually broke first.  
Covering her mouth   
as her eyes watered a bit,  
"Itʼs unfair." She whispered. They all knew that.

Ash was a champion,   
but unlike the others he made more freedom for himself, he could do things the others wished they could do. Meddling where they had no right to. By not officially taking his titles Ash became free. And he was suffering because of it.

Cynthia steeled herself taking a large breath. She walked over to the dresser and opened a drawer. 

  
" Volkner get dressed, we need to discuss things. Flint come with me now, your Pokémon can still guard the room" she gave her orders.  
"But Ash?" Volkner protested  
"He wonʼt be awake for a while at best" She answered.  
As she and Flint left to let Volkner change   
she added one final comment   
"I also called Lance, heʼs speeding his way where. He should be here either late tonight or early tomorrow"  
" _Shit_ " Volkner hissed as Flint snickered our the door behind her.  
——-

Finished giving a statement and some other odd work, Volkner walked down the hallway of this strange hospital. Towards the room, he shared with Ash. It seemed it was getting colder but that was just nonsense. 

Turning the last corner he lifted his head to see doctors swarming the room. Electivair and Magmortar not seen, Volkner jogged the rest of the way.  
Shoving doctors and nurses out of the doorway demanding in he got through the doorway to see the Pokémon preventing anyone from getting close to a thrashing Ash. Two had slipped past and were trying to subdue the thrashing man.

" **OUT! EVERYONE OUT** " he barked over the loud chatter of people and machines. Most complied Magmortar pushing a few out the door and Electivair growling at the few near Ash,  
"Get out! Before **_we throw you out_** " he spat   
"He needs sedation!" A lady shrilled, no   
Volkners dealt with Ashʼs nightmares he knows what Ash needs.

"No he needs to wake up now _Leave_ " so much venom in one word, how could they say no?  
As he moved to Ash he told Electivair to guard the door and tell Magmortar to go find Cynthia,  
"Donʼt let anyone in till I tell you" Volkner whispered to his Pokémon, following it to shut the door behind it.

Turning all his attention Volkner could help his heart as it ached at the sight of his boyfriend,  
Thrashing in the bed,- _that was something heʼs seen before_ \- screaming and yelling out in his sleep. Another familiar thing.   
What isnʼt familiar are the glowing marks pulsing an angry purple. 

Volkner raced to his side. Reaching around Ashʼs head so his arm didnʼt catch him. Volkner caught a glint and realized Ash had those claws again. Grabbing onto Ashʼs shoulders firmly but not harshly.

"Ash, Ash itʼs me, Iʼm here Ash" Volkner murmured into his ear,  
Almost instantaneously Ash grabbed for his head and arched his back up.  
"Arrhhh!" It was a mix between a scream and a groan and it hurt Volkner to listen to it.   
"Ash Iʼm here, Volkners here Ash, wake up" Volkner tried to hide the tremor in his voice, Volkner look to the hands and choked at the realization that those claws were now grabbing at Ashʼs head, Taking his hands from the shoulders he tried to grab at Ash's.  
Removing the hands from Ashʼs head was harder than holding him down. Once Volkner got them free seeing small traces of blood on the claws- _he had claws_ \- Ashʼs eyes shot open. Violent red with a purple center.   
_Not warm brown_.  
——-

The thing with these eyes was that there was recognition in them.  
They recognized Volkner, recognized the panic, the worry.   
Ash recognized Volkner was holding his arms. Arms that ended in sharp points...  
Sharp points with blood.

Ash using all the control and strength he had flung himself to the left of the bed he didnʼt know he was on. Falling off in the process of freeing himself from Volkner.  
_Was this Volkners blood_?

**_'Donʼt you mean more of his blood? We already spilled someʼ_** a voice only he could name spoke in his head.   
Ashʼs eyes grew in more fear and tears as he dragged himself back on the cold floor pushing past machines. Away from Volkner, Volkner who he hurt!  
His back hit a solid wall. He was cornered. Ash curled in on himself, tucking his head to his glowing chest. 

He began to sob, a heavy shoulder shaking sob that Volkner hated.  
Volkner stood facing Ash from the end of the bed he was just in. All warmth that might have been there gone.   
He stepped towards Ash, his boots sounded so quiet compared to the sobbing.   
Ash still heard them though,   
"Stay way Volkner" he wheezed through   
is sobbing, "Stay away..."   
Volkner took another few steps standing about two meters from Ash,

"Ash please look at me? Listen itʼs oka-"  
Ashʼs head snapped   
up red eyes glaring at him  
" **DONT SAY ITS OKAY** , what part of.. _part of me_... looks okay?!" Ash wailed coughing after finishing.  
"Ash" Volkner relented  
" I wish I had fallen off that edge. I wish I kept rolling, Iʼd rather anything than hurt you, or anyone" begged out, Volkner felt the bile in his belly roll.  
Ash placed his head back to his chest, Volkner moved forward again.

"And what? If you had fallen Ash, Flint would bash himself over the head again and again. If you had fallen I would have had to call your mum! What would she do? Ash... what would I do?" Volkner fought back   
_**'He is the lightening we sawʼthe bright light?'**_   
Ash broke into quieter sobs. And Volkner moved closer dropping to his knees in front of Ash. 

"Volkner you deserve someone whoʼs better than okay. I can't be that, I canʼt be okay again, Iʼm glowing for Lugiaʼs sake" Ash croaked. He doesnʼt mention the voice in his head.

"Ash?" Volkner is crying stinging tears and they hurt like his heart.  
Ash does lookup.

"Ash... I donʼt need you to be okay. Iʼm _so sorry I made you_ think you had to, that everyone makes you feel like that" Volkner confessed, he needed to get this out before he lost the fight with the tears.   
He already lost.  
"Iʼm not okay too. We can be not okay together for as long as you need, and... and maybe later on.. we...we can be okay." He was whimpering and shaking now.   
Ashʼs eyes were filled with more tears

"We can be okay later.... _together_ "

Volkner opened his arms and Ash couldnʼt help but rush into them.   
They were warm.  
They were home.

They sat together.

But of course, Volkner needed to tell Ash one more thing. Brushing some of his hair back Volkner looked down to Ash catching his warm brown eyes-Volkner loved those eyes-   
"We'll deal with the glowing thing later too" he garbled our laughing at his bad timing.  
Ash laughed to punching Volkners chest lightly, "Iʼm an actual glow stick arenʼt I"   
"Totally" Volkner chirped back wetly, his face hurt. They both fell into soft laughter.

.

.

.

" **VOLKNER? ASH? YOU OKAY!** " It was Flint yelling, spooking the two on the floor.  
"Flint seems fine" Ash laughed out  
"I wish he wasnʼt" Volkner groaned hiding his face in Ashʼs hair.


End file.
